[4] summer
fathers day 2017
To the Dad who I can indisputably say is one of the best in the world. To the dad who always left snacks at my bedroom door for me and my friends signed from "The Phantom." To the Dad who instilled my love of music, took me to my first show (Nsync, 2001) and who last summer shared tears and awe with me upon hearing Paul McCartney sing "Let it Be" at Desert Trip. To the Dad who was an incredible father to a son with disabilities until Jer's untimely passing.
To the dad who pours his heart and soul into Buffalo sports with minimal reward, hosting mini-parades around the block when I was a hid to celebrate a Bills win. To the dad who enjoys the simplest of things: spaghetti every Monday, cool weather, handwritten letters, collecting found coins throughout the year to indulge in a super bowl feast. To the dad who still refers to me as his little girl, supports my unorthodox life choices and worries about me driving after dark at 28 years old. To the dad who I was climbing mountains with nine months ago who now has so many mountains to climb himself; happy Father's Day. With love and hope that we have many more Father's Days to celebrate in the years to come. Love always, your best friend <3
july 10
Dads last round (for the foreseeable future) of chemo commencing tonight, his hair beginning to grow back (in the brain radiation spots) and me being home to witness both were three reasons to celebrate with three cones from every Spencerportarians fave 🍦 place. Some elements of his prognosis remain stable, some deteriorate while others improve. Cancer is fickle and unnerving and can cause you to be a tad bitter. But even a trio of small celebrations can make that mint-ting-a-ling (both my and dad's fave) just a little sweeter. #fuckcancer #especiallyfuckbraincancer
July 30
I woke up at 5 a.m. in Texas and warned my parents to stay put for a package arriving 12 hours later (does FedEx even deliver on Sundays? Still unsure). A half day of travel (while detailing my alleged day in Austin) and, once home, spying through the foliage waiting for the #perf moment, I called home and advised they check the porch for said package.
I was standing there, suitcase in hand, and omg..never-have-I-ever seen two more shocked and emotional reactions (along with apologies for not having ketchup or ranch at hand). I'm only in Rochester for a handful of hours but stopping as a surprise in Spencerport was priceless. Dad has another MRI early next week but is feeling positive and from what I've observed, is far less cloudy than two weeks ago when finishing a round of chemo. Card games and Krony's are on tap for this #SundayFunday
august 16
Happy birthday in Heaven to my little brother Jeremy James. Thought of you tremendously during a beach walk this AM collecting shells to bring back to mom & dad, reminiscent of the summers spent visiting the cape years ago. It should be your twenty-third, and we should be together indulging in your favorites today.
But as our family knows all too well and Lennon put best, "Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans." I'm fairly certain I quoted that in your eulogy, and I'm certainly certain I still think of you every day, six years after your untimely passing. Your death helped me look at life in a way that most people don't. I hope you're looking out for dad, your best bud, these days. And I hope you're looking out for the Bills to get some Ws this year, (God help us with that one). Until we meet again, happy birthday moose. ❤, your big sis
september 12
Eight months in, and most days it still feels inconceivable that one of my absolute faves, my Dad, was diagnosed with advanced Brain Cancer. Mom, Dad and I continue to take each day as it comes and grasp onto any positivity that we can as they encourage me to live a normal life. Aside from frequent visits to the ROC, oftentimes I tend to feel helpless.
Many of you know Steve Ragan. Whether it's from the elementary school days when he was coaching soccer and leaving snacks for us accompanied by a note from "The Phantom," hosting weekly spaghetti dinners each Monday throughout high school, making the 13 hour round trip to UCONN just to take my college friends to dinner for my birthday, or flying down to Austin to party like a 20-something with us on 6th, I'm beyond grateful he's developed relationships with each group of my friends. To know Steve is to love him.
This Sunday, I will be participating in the Austin, TX Livestrong 5K benefiting Cancer research. Please consider helping me meet my goal in the name of my Dad, the most resilient Bills fan you're even known and loved. Thanks, y'all and #GoBills
september 14
Since I had only 48 hours to fundraise for the LIVESTRONG 5K benefiting cancer research, I set a fundraising goal of $300. Y'all helped me annihilate that with a final total of $1,455. (Was my time great? .. no 😳. Was I one of the first in line for the grilled cheese food truck after? Yep). A massive thank you goes out to my family, friends & boyfriend for your incredibly generous donations. Crossing the finish line for Dad & all of your loved ones was v. rewarding